The privilege of old age

When I was 10, I thought 50 was ancient. Forty years seemed like an eternity through which I would never pass. But now that I’m just a couple of grey hairs from that particular milestone, I find myself revising my perception of age. Even 90 doesn’t seem old  anymore.

My dad will turn 90 next year (I think). He has enjoyed (or suffered) a modicum of fame during his career with An Garda Siochána (Irish Police) and at one stage was reputed to know every garda in the country by name. Now, when he’s not up the garden digging potatoes, or hauling turf in from the bog, he can be found on the golf course.  Fair play, I say. The man is a legend – in my corner of the world at least.

This week, I met another legend from a different world. Another nonagenarian whose life experiences are the stuff history is made of. Born in 1921, Hórváth János was the youngest member of the Hungarian parliament when he was elected in 1945. And when he left office in 2014, he was the oldest serving parliamentarian in Hungarian history.

In the years in between he trained as an economist, worked as a mechanic, and lectured in economics for years to a body of students who still visit him today. In 1944, while part of the Arrow Cross resistance, he was arrested by the Gestapo, imprisoned, and sentenced to death. He escaped just hours before he was scheduled to depart this world.  In 1947, he was arrested again, this time by the Russians and accused of being an enemy of the people. He was sentenced to four years’ hard labour and did his time.

In 1956, he escaped a second time, to America, as a diplomat of the revolution. There, he got a PhD from Columbia, ran twice against the rooted incumbent Democrat Andrew Jacobs for a seat in the House of Representatives, and rubbed shoulders with US Presidents Bush Snr and Reagan. The man is indeed a legend ‒ a legend now back in Budapest after more than 40 years States-side ‒ hale and hearty with a twinkle in his eye that belies his years and speaks to the young man still very much alive inside.

Statistics show that we’re living longer, healthier lives. Yet falling birth rates and increased life expectancy come with the social problems of higher dependency ratios: we have fewer people able to work to support an ageing population. Many argue that were we smarter about how we’re handling the migration crisis currently underway, we might be in a position to redress this imbalance. Something certainly has to be done.

In the meantime though, I think we need to take a new look at the aged and the ageing and instead of seeing old age as something akin to a disease, perhaps we could listen to American social activist Maggie Kuhn. She had 90 years to conclude that ‘old age is not a disease – it is strength and survivorship, triumph over all kinds of vicissitudes and disappointments, trials and illnesses.’

Perhaps if we listened a little harder to what these nonagenarians have to say, we might not end up making the same mistakes over and over again. Perhaps if we took the time to engage with them more, not as frail human beings approaching the end of their days but as fonts of wisdom and knowledge who could teach us a thing or three, we might make benefit from their years of experience. Perhaps if we paid more attention to how they have arrived at where they are, we might better appreciate the sanctity of life and realise that old age is indeed a privilege denied to many.

First published in the Budapest Times 25 September 2015

Old age4

Subscribe to get notified when I publish something new.

2 Responses

  1. That was brilliant Mary, one of your best definitely. Wish I could have been at your table.
    The Migrant situation offers a golden opportunity to redress the falling birth rate in many European countries,[The German view] as well as to welcome the specialist skills that many of these people have to offer.
    Can one even begin to imagine what it must be like to feel so dispossessed, that you feel that you have been robbed of your very identity. Not being able to say I’m a Brick Layer, a Plumber, an Electrician, a Nurse, a Doctor, whatever; because you know that in the eyes Victor Orban and his like, including sadly, the Hungarian Catholic Church, you are nothing more than a threat and a nuisance.

  2. Remember Corneille’s celebrated line: O rage! O désespoir! O vieillesse ennemie! And Dylan Thomas: Old age should burn and rave at close of day,/Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
    Rather than ‘fewer people able to work’ we have an aging population administratively forced into ‘retirement’ when, in many cases, they are able and willing to go on doing something useful. Which, of course, some do.
    The impact on all this of the current migrant situation remains to be seen, despite Mr Mercer’s romantic confidence. As there are already, for one thing, unemployment problems in Western Europe it is hard to see the influx having a positive influence.

Talk to me...

%d bloggers like this:

By continuing to use the site, you agree to the use of cookies. more information on cookies and GDPR

Cookies and GDPR Compliance

The cookie settings on this website are set to "allow cookies" to give you the best browsing experience possible. If you continue to use this website without changing your cookie settings or you click "Accept" below then you are consenting to this.

General Data Protection Regulation

If you have voluntarily submitted your email address so that you can receive notifications of new posts, please be assured that I don't use your address for anything other than to do just that - and that's done automatically. I might use your address, if I knew how to, but I don't.

This blog does not make money, it does not carry sponsored content, it has no ads for which I receive any form of payment. If I review a place or a restaurant or a book, I don't receive any compensation from anyone. I wish I did, but that would require marketing myself and life is too short. If something changes, I will be sure to let you know.

You can unsubscribe at any time by clicking the unsubscribe or manage subscription links at the bottom of every email you receive. When you comment on a blog post, Google Analytics tracks where you're posting from. This is stored and I can check my stats to see how many clicks I had today, where people clicked from, and what they clicked on. That's it. Nothing more.

I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive, particularly to other commenters. If you want to have one of your comments deleted, the please get in touch with me at: I'm all for the right to be forgotten so will happily oblige.

So, in a nutshell, if you give me your email address voluntarily to subscribe to new posts or if you opt to subscribe to new comments, then you email is just used for this. Nothing else. Promise.